Currently . . . (Vol. 4)

Linking up with A Mama Collective and Cassie for "Currently."

Thinking about: Small talk. I am in a small talk season of life. I am not good at it. I am good at long, deep conversations. I am good at listening. I am good at joking with people who get my dry, sarcastic sense of humor. I am not good at idle chit chat as I encounter new people, feel out the water for new friends, and engage the mom pushing the swing next to me. Small talk is hard for me. Yet, on occasion, I'm able to get outside of myself and do it (maybe even do it well). I'm pondering what differences there are those times when conversation is easy and when it is hard. It might to a long way to helping me meet people and make some positive connections along the way.
 
Reading: Summerland by Elin Hilderbrand. So two years ago? Oh well. I think the bigger news is that I actually checked out a grown-up book from the library and am actually reading a book. I've just done so little reading in the last few months, but there is something magical about frothy beach reads in the summer. My favorite thing about summer growing up was going to the library and checking out a stack of fun, easy reads that I tore through all summer long.

Listening to: music on hold. Always joyful. A friend once worked for a telecom company, and taught me the correct term for it is, in fact, "music on hold" or "MOH," and that companies actually select what they use for MOH. I wouldn't be surprised if there were studies done showing what sorts of music are least aggravating for customers, how often there should be a "thanks for holding" and that sort of thing.
 
Watching: The light dance through the leaves and the wind blow the grass out our bay window that looks into the front yard. There is something beautiful and magical outside the window today. Maybe it's just the overwhelming feeling of hope that bubbles and brims over today. Maybe it's the humidity hanging thick in the air. Maybe it's the weather changing before my eyes. Maybe it's all in my mind, but it's enchanting. Together with the elevator music soundtrack, my mind keeps wondering.

That window right there -- paint preview free of charge.

Thankful for: July. July brings lots of good things in our family. Independence Day. Our anniversary. Clare's birthday. Most importantly, this year at least, is that July 1 is the "Medical New Year." Starting tomorrow, Charles will officially be a medical intern. I feel like the last many weeks have been one long transition, one change after another. And they have been good, beautiful changes, but they have been changes all the same. Tomorrow, Charles will walk out the door and he will go to work (real work, not school that's work that we call work but is really school -- did you follow?). As far as I know, things will have a chance to settle into the daily rhythm of everyday life. No changes for awhile. Thankful for the beauty of the mundane.

Via

7 Quick Takes, Vol. 69

Boo to another week without much happening on ye ol' blog. But . . . I do have a couple of drafts that I'm still tweaking. Plus, things seem to be settling into a more normal rhythm around here, so that's good for the blog as well. :) Linking up with Jen for my Friday update of a post. :)

1.Charles has had another week of orientation. I am pretty sure he's sick-to-death of orientation. So much sitting and listening. Next week is finally his first week of residency rotations. He's ready and us at home, we're as ready as we'll ever be. I know it won't be all fun and games, but we might as well get on with it. :)

2. One annoying things that has hampered my blogging the last couple of weeks (besides, you know, moving) has been the ridiculously poor quality of our internet connection. Our frustration was mounting badly then on Monday, after we got everything up and running again (see #3, below), we couldn't get the TV or the internet going. So, after two calls, plenty of time on hold, lots of resets, and an over-the-phone diagnosis, a tech came out to see what was wrong. And, lo, the tech who did our initial installation did really shoddy work. Tech #2 fixed all of the poor work and BAM! services up and running again!

3. We've started tackling Operation Freshen up the House by tackling the project that is the living room. We scraped the ceiling of it's popcorn glory on Sunday. (And by "we" I mean Charles, while I chased the kiddos.) Monday we started painting and replaced some light fixtures. We didn't finish (this weekend, hopefully-maybe!), so you'll have to wait for before and after glory, but we feel good to be really making this house feel like home.

A before preview

4. Added to the to-do list: buy brown sugar. I was all set yesterday afternoon to make my inaugural batch of chocolate chip cookies in the new house when . . . I realized I haven't bought brown sugar yet. I had the stuff to pull together some peanut butter cookies, but I had wanted chocolate chip. Talk about First World Problems.

5. Diva Clare decided to wear sunglasses to breakfast the other day. No, I don't have my hands full. Not at all.

Filter via Instagram

6. Speaking of my little diva darling, I took her to story time at the library on Tuesday. There was a misunderstanding on my part about where it would be (because it wasn't in the children's section where I expected it), and Clare refused to go. She just wanted to sit at a table and read books instead.  Then she wanted to read all the book in the grown up section when I went to find something for myself, and gave me a chance to practice alphabetizing. Goofy little bookworm.

7. I'm going to try really, really hard not to talk about the weather every.single.week, but ohmygosh, a little weather talk is inevitable. But I'm still charmed by actual weather changes, and enjoyed a cool, rainy day yesterday.

This is how rain makes me feel.

Have a lovely weekend!

7 Quick Takes, Vol. 68

Finally Friday (errrr...Saturday) -- linking up with Kathryn of Team Whitaker, who's filling in for Jen during her vacation.

1. I'm finally feeling reoriented to time and place after a crazy-cakes last week. There was an overall (un)pleasant 16 hour drive with two kids in a mini-van, the unusual experience of arriving at/moving into a house I had only seen via FaceTime, and the always very (un)pleasant task of unpacking all those boxes we spent so many hours packing. Big thank you to my dad and Rhonda for their help driving us out here!

Wichita or Bust -- from somewhere in NM

2. The key to feeling settled in a house: the kitchen is totally unpacked and put together. It doesn't matter that there is still no art on the walls or that the crib is still in pieces in the nursery. I can made dinner and do dishes and put things away. I feel complete.

Now to decide what color to paint that wall.

3. We're able to still have the crib disassembled, because Clare has moved to a twin. We'd been building up for weeks the fact that, when we went to Wichita, she's get to sleep in a "bi' burl bed." So far, she's doing really well. It probably helps that her room is still mostly empty and she hasn't figured out that she can get out of the bed if she really wants to, thanks to the bed rail.

Bed unmade -- bedding in progress

4. In spite of the fact that I am 99.9% sure that this Arizona girl is going to die of humidity, we're loving being here so far. We love that there are trees and that we have a yard for the kids to run around. The previous owners of our house left swings on the trees, so Clare has been begging to "swinging" about 1 million times per day. We can walk to two different parks (provided, in the summer, that we go in the mornings). I'm trying really hard to get us out of the house and get involved, so we have that going for us, too. Since that isn't easy for me, it is definitely worth noting.

Trying the big girl swing

5. One thing that is helping me get into a groove is that Charles started residency orientation this week. I miss him when he's gone, especially on late days (and am especially especially dreading the long hours of residency), but it does let us get into more of a rhythm. So far, so good, I guess. I mean, orientation is orientation, so . . . yeah.

6. One thing hindering me from getting into a groove: daylight saving time. I know Arizona is an anomaly, but why, oh why, do people think the sun staying up until 9 at night is a good idea?!? Why?!?!? We're not in Alaska or Scandinavia. Just.not.right.

7. We have a full weekend of residency orientation social activities ahead of us. And I should probably suck it up and unpack some of those boxes in the basement. :-P

And maybe lawn mowing . . .

Have a lovely weekend!

7 Quick Takes, Vol. 38

Joining Jen and friends for 7QTs.

1. People love to ask how things are going in _________. The thing though, is that (aside from my whining) life is life wherever we are. What we see outside the windows may change. The rooms may change. The number of people we know in an x-mile radius may change, but we don't change. One thing that has really helped Clare is keeping her routine. Meaning we still eat breakfast and lunch and dinner. We still get dressed and ready. We still play and read. Charles goes to "work" and comes home from work. The sun goes up. The sun goes down. Another day.

2. The real first-world-problem drag about this rotation is that I've hit that awkward point in pregnancy when my normal clothes are getting too tight and my maternity stuff is still too big. Packing was a drag (most forgiving items from both wardrobes ended up in the suitcase), and my wardrobe would be much more flexible at home. Like I say, total first-world-problem.

3. I swore way back when that on night that Charles can't be home for dinner I would at least occasionally indulge and make a real dinner that he wouldn't eat anyway. Don't get me wrong. I'm not above macaroni, hot dogs or grilled cheese. I'm sure those will be in heavy use on future night float rotations. But last night, I made a semi-homemade chicken potpie.I was inordinately proud of myself until I teeny bit of juice overflowed (and of course I didn't have a pan under the pie plate. Bad, Ash!!), and the drippings must have smoked enough to set the super sensitive (??) smoke alarm off. Thankfully, turning on the vent fixed it rapidamente, but there were a couple of highly frustrated minutes there.

Pre-baked beauty. Store bought crust. Someday, I'll master the real deal.

4. I'm excited for cool weather this weekend. I know, I know. No one cares about the weather. Especially normal fall weather. But oh my gosh!! I am so excited!!

5. Too much rambling about nothing? Photo break!!

Loving the yard!

6. Part II of surviving Night 1 of 2 (that ain't nothin'!!) of night shifts while we're here?!? Project Runway (in real time, what?!?) and mango sorbet. Yep. Wild. And. Crazy. But PR is making me think of this pretty green butterfly we see in the yard that is so beautifully camouflage with the plants. Train of thought? Time to put this post to a merciful end.

7. I'm just ready for the weeeeeeeeeeeekend. I love these glorious weekends on the road when Charles is off and we both feel able to take advantage and appreciate the time as a family fully. Contentment. Joy. Bliss.

Have a lovely weekend!

Wacky Wild Wichita Style

Ok, I don't know if Wichita qualifies as either wacky or weird. But I haven't been here long enough to pass judgement on wonderful, though we've certainly enjoyed our first 36 hours or so, and alliteration seems appealing since I've only had 1/3 cup of coffee.

Anyway . . . we're in Wichita, safe and sound.

The drive was looooong, but uneventful. We made it out of town Friday afternoon to shave a few hours off, and hit the road again before the crack of dawn on Saturday. This was I-40 before we stopped for breakfast:

Sunrise over the horizon

Then, when I wasn't driving and listening to a John Grisham (I even had Charles interested in this one -- win!), I had this view:

Then, finally, this was out the rear window as we drove across Kansas:

Driving at sunrise and sunset. (Not) awesome.

But, like I say, we made it safe and sound. Yesterday, we were able to sleep late (Clare still seems to be on MST), go to a lunchtime Mass, and do a little exploring (and grocery shopping). Overall, we've liked the little bit of Wichita we've seen (and the house, which belongs to some friends, is wonderful!). Today, Charles is on Day 1 of his rotation, and we are awfully excited about it. So far, so good.

Group selfies by the river

7 Quick Takes, Vol. 37

Joining Jen et al. I think I can actually make these quick. Aaaaaand go.

1. I should be packing or doing something productive to get ready for the trip to Wichita, buuuuut. I'm going to do this first. In my defense, I have most stuff ready to go. It's just taking a shower and getting last minute stuff ready spaghetti to go. I've gotten pretty good at that this summer.

2. I'm not, not, not looking forward to the drive. Being in Wichita, 4 weeks. Got it. We're gonna rock it. It will fly. Never thought I would look forward to going to Wichita. But getting there? Not so much.

3. I owe lots of thank yous for congratulations and well wishes after my little announcement this week!! We're so happy and excited!

4. Here are some more outtakes from our failed photoshoot. Usually Clare will point at my tummy when you ask her were the baby is, but put a camera in front of her and . . . no go. She will not perform for an audience. Ever ever never.

5. Yesterday was the first day Clare showed more interest in walking than crawling. We're hoping the trend continues. She's also getting up and down from the couch like it's her job. And hasn't gotten injured yet. We consider that a win.

6. My amazing brother-in-law (well, both of my brothers-in-law are amazing, but this is Charles' brother) sent me a box of Harry & David peaches for my birthday that arrived the other day. I have been gorging us all on amazing peachy goodness. So much yumminess!!! Feeling spoiled.

7. Keeping it all in perspective: an old friend from junior high/high school/family friend just got a rough diagnosis for his son who is just a few weeks younger than Clare. The family can use all the prayers they can get, if you will oblige.

One half-watched episode of Bubble Guppies and done!! Not bad!

Have a lovely weekend!

On Houses and Homes

Over the course of 8 weeks this summer, we lived in two short-term, furnished rentals. We were blessed to find them both via Craigslist. True story. We had a good house with a bad landlord and a bad house with a good landlord. It has given me some time to reflect on things that really make a house a home.

First, some long-promised notes on things the whackadoo crazy landlord who drove me batty in St. Louis. These are the most memorable:

• She would come over without warning. Or calling from the driveway telling us that she was about to enter.
• She was so afraid of something happening to her wood floors or 40-year-old furniture that we were paranoid about doing something to them. As a result, we could never fully relax. 
• She was afraid of soap scum on her bathroom tile, so asked us to only use health-store soap. I'm not faulting anyone who chooses natural health and beauty products. I am saying it's a personal decision, and if I want to use soap, I'm gonna use soap. And we did.
• She decided to strip the basement floors without any warning whatsoever. So Clare and I spent a morning breathing noxious fumes, listening to loud, scary (for Clare) noises, trapped in Clare's bedroom (because, of course, Charles drove to work that day, so I didn't have a car so we could escape). 
• She came over a couple of times to show the house to potential future renters, which was totally fine. The first time, she called in advance (!!!!) and we got the house cleaned up and the baby chaos toys contained. The second time, she called as we were sitting down to dinner. We ate a cold meal that evening, because we have enough dignity to not want her showing her house strewn with toys, dirty dishes (from, you know, cooking said dinner), etc.
• She openly admitted to some sketchy things she does to go around the occupancy codes. That left us unimpressed, but at least it didn't affect us, so we didn't feel the need to make waves.

Babies, furniture, and food . . . oh my!

And some things that have made the Denver house less-than-ideal:

• No central air conditioning -- Do I love living in a place where "hot" is over 100 and "really hot" is over 110? Not particularly. I dread the first triple-digit day with the best of 'em and watch eagerly for the last one. Then for the last 90 degree day of the calendar year -- hopefully in October, but too often in November. What makes it all tolerable, though? Central air.
• Stuff. Everywhere.
• No washer-dryer -- It has been years since I have had to go very far to get to my very own washer-dryer. Did I take that for granted quite often? Heeeeeck yes. Did I appreciate the h-e-double-hockey-sticks out of it when Clare was spitting up hourly? Double h-e-hockey . . .  yes, yes, I did. But did I realize how many little tiny perks come from having your own laundry tools at your disposal until I had to make multiple trips to the laundromat each week to keep us all in clean underwear. No, no, no. I was happy, very happy, to have my washer back.
• Split-levels -- it don't know that it would be that big of a deal if this was our place and we could thoughtfully employ baby gates, or if it was not such an attractive nuisance for her, but as it is, I spent four weeks hawk watching to make sure Clare didn't hurl herself down stairs or whatnot.
• The plumbing drama -- somehow, it turned into my problem, and I was not invested beyond the inconvenience of brushing my teeth in the kitchen. Plus, had it been my problem, I'd have been less picky about the particular plumber in the interest of getting the job taken care of and more interested in simply getting the job done. At least I can happily report that it was taken care of.
• Not having separate spaces for Clare and us -- It was a real challenge not having a safe place for Clare to play that didn't double as our space. Finding creative ways to keep things out of her ever-expanding reach kept us on our toes.
 

 

Beyond that door? A foot-wide ledge and several step high drop off.

So, with those things in mind, what makes a house a home? I've had this sitting in draft for, literally, over a month trying to answer that question articulately. And it left me doing a lot of soul-searching. One thing that kept creeping into my head was, "Home is where the heart it." If my heart is in my spiffy kitchen gadgets, fancy couch or king-sized bed, there's something wrong. My heart is with my family, and they were with me the whole time.

We have been so blessed to have places to stay the whole time we were on the road, and even more blessed to have plenty of space in those houses. In many ways, I think I've been blessed with the gift of perspective, a new way of seeing and appreciating all that I do have.

That said, coming home to our space was such a breath of fresh air. We have relished in a renewed way our stuff, our autonomy, and the comfort of our own space. And I think this perspective will carry me far in Wichita. I'm excited to embrace the real truth, which is that, at the end of the day, we have each other. We have food and shelter and our health.

Where my heart really is.

The rest is gravy.

7 Quick Takes, Vol. 36

Joining Jen and the rest for Friday (afternoon) 7 Quick Takes.

1. Clare is going through some sort of nap reset/resistance/nap dropping phase. I mean, I know it's normal and all, but it's totally messing with my mojo and making my ability to get back on the blogging bandwagon more difficult as I try to figure out what my day looks like when there is only one nap. I'm determined. Plus, I have a couple of posts in draft status that I think will unblock a bit of writer's block. I hope.

Motto: more coloring, less napping

2. Yesterday was my birthday. The introvert in me is all about not making a big, crazy deal out of it, but I had a lovely day of breakfast with extended family, a stroll through Target, and dinner with Charles and Clare. I'm sure 32 is gonna be awesome. It already is. :) Really, what more could a girl ask for?

3. Answer, a break from this **** heat. I'm over the 100+ temps. I really, truly am. Growing up, the county fair was the weekend after my birthday and you always, always needed a sweatshirt at night when you went to the fair. Here, a mere 2 hours south . . . not so much.

4. I'm going to stop complaining about the (lack of) fall. I am. In large part because this is our last week in Phoenix before another (and last!) away rotation for Charles. Next Friday, we head to Wichita, Kansas. I never, ever, in my whole life imagined going to Wichita (or much of anywhere else in Kansas), much less potentially living there, but here we are. The medical journey has already taken us places, literally, that I've never imagined. The beauty of that is how much is has already stretched and grown me as a person. And I know there's more to come, because I know residency has plenty of surprises up its sleeve for us.

5. That was kinda two takes, so I'll fill this one with a picture. You're welcome.

Insta Mama feeding her baby

6. The good thing about this second departure is that we're much more experienced as packers and road warriors. And it's only four weeks. We got this.

Road warrior and her straw sippy.

7. I'm sure you've seen this Whole Foods satire floating around the web (or Grace's QTs). The timing was perfect, because a new one opened nearby this week. Every time I drive by, it is teeming with cars, circling like mall vultures on Black Friday. I have to admit to enjoying an occasional wistful wander through the ridiculous, wishing it were not completely crazy to spend a billion dollars on gorgeous, high-quality ingredients. Even so, the parking lot reaction is crazy!!

Enough babble from me. Have a lovely weekend!

7 Quick Takes - Vol. 31

Since, I haven't really written much about life in St. Louis, here are 7 takes worth of thoughts on life here.

1. Overall, life in St. Louis is good. I can't complain about anything that is St. Louis' fault. I will probably have more to say about my landlord when she is no longer our landlord and I can feel free to vent away without worrying about the highly unlikely even that she will find this, read it, and use it as an excuse to keep our security deposit.

2. Humidity. I don't like it. I can live with it. I can tolerate it. I can bear an afternoon outside with 90some degrees and humidity. But given the option, I would just as soon pass.

3. My biggest fear when we set out on this little adventure was that I would go crazy. We have one car, so some days, I drop Charles off. Some days, I'm carless. It has actually been a nice balance between the busyness of getting stuff done while I have the car and relaxed, quiet days at home when I don't. I was also worried about the lack of community, but it has been ok. Don't get me wrong. I look forward to being close to family in Denver next month week (already!). I look forward to getting home to my peeps. I know the importance of building community if/when we do a longer-term move. But for the time being, I've survived.

4. Last night was not my first 24 hour shift as a med school wife, but it strangely felt like it. Probably because I was alone at night with the baby in a new place for the first time. Would I be ok? Would I freak out? What would I use for the white/TV noise I usually fall asleep with when Charles is gone? All for naught. I read myself to sleep and all was well. One thing I can safely say about myself is that I'm not scared of the night.

5. As an aside to #1, I don't know that it is St. Louis' fault, exactly, but there aren't nearly enough Starbucks for my taste, at least not in this part of town. Now, don't get me wrong, as much as I enjoy a latte, I don't really treat myself that often. (Except coffee dates with friends, but that's a different story.) But somehow, the mere fact that I couldn't get one if I wanted to without dragging my poor baby 20 minutes down the road in a hot, humid car makes me want one. All of which has turned into something of an obsession.

6. One of the times I do treat myself to Starbucks, is when I sometimes go, get a latte, and read on a weekend afternoon. Alone. No Clare. No Charles. (Well, usually they're together. ;) ). Just me and a book and a coffee. Bliss. So when I wanted to do it the first time a couple of weeks ago, I was thwarted -- big time --  by the initial drive, which took the wind out of my sails. Sad Mama.

7. Beyond that, though, the weekends have been glorious!! Oh, have they been glorious. Yes, Charles has to hit the hospital Saturday morning, but then we've had so much fun being tourists and exploring the city and, best of all, enjoying our little family. So wonderful!

Tourists at the zoo

Clare understood the animals for the first time! And loved the penguins!

The people who dragged their baby on the Budweiser tour.

I'm off to enjoy my post-call husband. Have a lovely weekend and check out Jen and the Gang for more!

7 Quick Takes, Vol. 30

Joining Jen for 7 Quick Takes.

1. Last night, Charles and I were participating in the ultimate act of partnership -- I was taking out the trash while he gathered recyclables -- when I saw a spark of light. Was it? No. Then again. Magic. Ok, lightening bugs. When we arrived in STL a couple of weeks ago, we were disappointed not to see any. But last night, we found them flickering around. I ran inside, and squealed, "Honey! Fireflies!" I'm sure I sounded like I was 5 (and there really weren't that many), but I didn't care. I was so excited.

Magic - Via

2. As an aside, ladies, if you're still on the hunt, find someone who will gather the recyclables. Added bonus if he pulls a Charles and sneaks into the baby's room to get the (dirty) diapers to take out. Hallie linked this article in her 5 Favorites on Wednesday, and Haley could not be more right. No flowers, chocolates or promises you don't intend to keep (Beauty and the Beast? Anyone? I'll stop.) are more romantic and sexy than simple, daily acts of service from your beloved.

3.  Anyway, while we're standing there feeling like 5-year-olds as we marvel at the lightening bugs, we see a possum lumbering across the neighbor's yard. I squealed in delight and announced that I felt like I was living in a fairy tale.

Via - A Google image search for "possum" turns up lots of creepy stuff if you're so inclined.

4. For reals, yo, I hope that, however tough life may be or how easy it can be to become overwhelmed or jaded or cynical or whatever, I never lose my ability to be delighted in one way or another.

5. Clare is a lot of things, but eager to walk is not one of them. I'm pretending not to be worried/annoyed/whatever. And I know that she still has plenty of time. And I know that once she's walking, she'll be alllllll over. But still, the mama in me sees my smart, strong, girl who is totally capable of taking a step or two and really wants her to let go. Plus, I don't want to feel like I'm holding her back just because I want to hang on to her babyhood as long as I can. No conclusion. Just thoughts.

6. One thing she is eager to do is self-feed. No problem when she's getting bites of fruits and veggies and whatnot, since she's been doing it all along. Bigger problem when it comes to yogurt and the like. We're entering the gloriously messy phase of "learning to use utensils." She also wants to control her own plate/bowl, mostly so she can dump its contents and then discard it on the floor. "Phsaw, Mom, that bowl and that peach is not good enough for Princess Me." Anyway, this week, I've been giving her the empty bowl at the end of a meal to play with and yesterday, she actually put her strawberries back into her bowl and then took them out herself to put on the tray! Progress?

Mmmm...breakfast

7. If you're not already, please keep Dwija in your prayers. I cannot.even.imagine.

Have a lovely weekend!